Seeking Experienced Mothers
When we have children, we all know that they will need a lot of time, care, and devotion. However, each day there are children born to 'oops parents', those who have intercourse with no protection, that are not thinking of the consequences to their carelessness. The orphanages are always with children who would love to have a family of their own. How many orphanages could be shut down if people were more careful and responsible? "Abandoned children are the most helpless and most frequent victims of violence, disease, malnutrition and death. Without the support from their families, these children are exposed to the frightening dangers of abduction and sexual exploitation." (source)
Put yourself in a child's position - you are a month old and left on the street, you have no protection, no food because you can't feed yourself, you're just left crying in the streets. Or if you were 4 years old and your parent takes you outside into a strange area never to come back for you because you are too much of a bother for their comfortable lifestyle. You are afraid of the many unknowns to life. You have no money to buy food, no job, car, you are not old enough to have these things. You should be in preschool learning what friendship is, and how to do maths, not how to pull trash out of a can that can be your next meal.
How many abortions would be non-existent if people thought about the possibility of having a child? Think of being a baby about to be aborted - you have a heartbeat, a nice warm mother carrying you around in her belly, you are happy and comfortable. If you are under 12 weeks in utero you are lucky and simply get vacuumed out like crumbs on the floor. Over that age, however, is more gruesome. The doctor opens a fresh pack of shiny instruments. He's an extremely calm, softly spoken man, which somehow makes his words all the more devastating. "The fetus can't come out in one go. We haven't dilated sufficiently for that. The fetal parts are soft enough to break apart as they are being removed..."
In other words, he has to dismember the fetus inside the uterus and pull it out, bit by bit. He uses an ultrasound scan to guide him. Even then, some body parts are too large to come out intact. "A mental vision to consider is a doctor grips his thumb between the surgical forceps and squeezes gently. "Those parts are the skull and then the spine and pelvis, and in fact they are crushed..."- Deborah Davies (source)
These horrid things can be kept from happening if people were simply careful and responsible. How can we simply suggest to give a mother a break when no one is getting punished except for the children. When it is better to simply turn the TV on and let them watch cartoons all day instead of talking to them and holding them. A mother that downloads an app on her mobile phone instead of taking care of her children. She doesn't have to worry about anything because the government pays for her food stamps and TANF. She is separated from the father who does get to care for that child because of their custody agreement. When the father does get time with his child he takes all the time he can outside of his full time job to spend with that child.
There can't be an excuse of "just not being used to it" in order to get out of being a mother or a father. All parents need a break at times, as a mother of 2 I sure enjoy the occasional 'time for mama', but that should not outweigh the care and love for a child. As adults we need to remember who are supposed to be a role model and show responsibility to the next generation. Because remember, they are likely to mirror what happens to them when they have children of their own.
Children take a lot of time, money, care, and devotion, if that can't be given then be responsible. Sex is not so important that time can't be taken to be responsible about it. If birth control is that much of a hassle then tubes need to be tied or vasectomies done. A child should not grow up knowing friends and baby sitters more than their parents, "just not used to it" is just not good enough.