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Donald trump

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ďIf you want to crown Ďem then crown their ass! But they are who we thought they were! And we let Ďem off the hook!Ē -Dennis Green


Itís hard to watch the media these days and not see Donald Trumpís massive orange head plastered all over it. Trumpís speeches are headline news. The man doesnít pass on an opportunity to stick his foot in his mouth or talk out his ass. He oozes contempt - a hideous caricature of greedy businessmen, a self-aggrandizing megalomaniac - one straight out of an Oliver Stone flick.

And yet itís this man who, by all accounts, sits high atop the Republican Presidential polls. A man who has never held public office and is most widely known as the Ďstarí of his own reality show.

After years of ridicule everyone has finally started taking Trump seriously, which says more about the other nomineeís disastrous campaign management more than anything - Bush 2.5ís campaign has, for example, resorted to ĎLate Nightí talk show raffles to draw finance money despite the fact Bushís Super PAC reported over $120 million in campaign fundraisers.

Trump Mania has become too big a problem for the GOP to ignore any longer.

Hell-bent on disarming the Trump frenzy, and thus continuing the status quo, Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus asked all candidates this past week to sign a pledge where in theyíd forgo running as an independent candidate and shift all support to the actual nominee given they lose out fair and square. Donald Trump was the only candidate who refused to promise not to run as an Independent in the first Republican debate. It goes to show just how petulant our swinish Ďrepresentativesí are. ĎNot fair! I play by the rules! Why does he get to say whatever he wants? How come he has no one to answer to?í

Trumpís candid remarks come with the polls to back him. That support has the man ready to say anything and everything to assure himself of a presidential nomination. How shocking to hear a Republican call out the bankers of America and the low tax rates they command or more recently chiding Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis for refusing to issue a marriage license to a same-sex couple.†

The prominent multi-billionaire running for office is nothing new. Hell, most of the bastards even enjoyed a modicum of success. Ross Perot managed nearly 20% of the vote in 1992, just enough to fuck over good ole Bush Sr. After stints as governors of their respective states George Romney and Nelson Rockefeller threw their hats into the Republican candidacy cluster-fuck of 1968. Letís not forget three terms as mayor of New York City wasnít quite enough for Michael Bloomberg. $30 billion was enough to extend that term limit. But when youíve got $30 billion you deserve as many terms as money can buy.

But Trump is the wild card. The outsiderís outsider. A man so far detached from reality heís just too goddamn stubborn to put his own sad excuse of a comb-over out of its miserable existence.

Yup. We are good and fucked, so why not cease total control to the true royalty of this country - the power hungry minions of Trumpís ilk. Time to quit pretending who really runs our government. Give these elitist pigs the chance to fuck it up without avoiding the blame as they stand hidden behind the money curtain.

Do we really need another Clinton or Bush in the White House? The two presidents who reduced the most powerful position in the world to a laughing stock of sexual mockery and ape like levels of intelligence.

Itís too late on the Democrat side. Even with enthusiastic youth behind him, Bernie Sanders poses no real threat. Hillaryís ticket is booked. Regardless of what vile treachery lurks at the depths of her personal emails another Clinton will appear on the presidential ballot next year. The same canít quite be said about Jeb Bush, but most still consider him the GOP favorite.

Poor Jeb. The faint imaginations of your idiot brother were just fading in peopleís minds. Eight years is a long time to wait for your shot in the spotlight. And now, to possibly have it snatched away by this self-absorbed cartoon character, must really suck.†

Another Bush? Another Clinton? Another any of them? All cut from the same cloth, greased by the same corporate overlords, codified by the same social elite, and voted on by the same clueless electorate all because we are too goddamn afraid to admit the whole thing is a sham that hasnít worked properly since the Eisenhower era. Better to fool ourselves and keep preaching sweet nothings. No. No more.

No more refurbished amalgamations of past participants. You donít save the world by rebranding shit. Thatís why itís time to give an entirely new breed of menacing slime the chance to fuck it all up. Thatís why we need a leader both parties can hate and refuse to work with. The forced camaraderie just may salvage everyone from our ďdo nothingĒ times.

We need Donald Trump.†

Itís time to ride full-steam ahead with the lunacy. No more countless idling. Letís jam our full weight on that accelerator of craziness and drive top-speed over the cliff, burst into a flaming orange rocket, and careen off with no end in sight. Itís the only true American way.


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